While surfing the net (yeah, I just wrote that lol) I came across a discussion concerning a child sustaining a scratched cornea just days before her baptism. This sounds terrible, I feel bad any time a child is hurt, but to be in pain and then put on display at a big party and  passed around like a tray of hors d’oeuvres sounds truly awful. The mother wanted prayers and blah blah blah… but then sweetened the pot by blaming the injury on Satan… as he was clearly trying to sabotage the baptism. I received all of this through a post about a post so I do not know what type of response this got but I do know that to me, this is just plain ridiculous.

Social media is a place to show off. Everyone has to have the worst injury, the cutest baby, the cleanest house, the grossest rash  and they cannot wait to be validated.  Then when something bad happens they just absolutely need to plead for prayers. These posts can become incredibly lame and it isn’t just Atheists that think so, I have seen plenty of believers say that asking friends to “please pray my son scores a goal in soccer” is obnoxious and not what they wish to have their God wasting time on. When you are in a truly tough situation, like a death in the family, I see no harm in posting for prayers- I myself have asked for “positive thoughts” to be sent my way… sometimes it just feels good to know people care. There are definitely times where we need the most support we can get and if this comes in the form of “prayers” so be it.   However, I do not support vaguebook prayer requests… this type is the worst of the worst for prayer seeking. “I cannot tell you what is happening, but it is bad, so so bad, please ask God to save me” . Wait, what?? If it “bad, so so bad” shouldn’t you be with the police or at a hospital or just skipping the pedestrian prayers and running straight to a priest??? With the vaguebookers we don’t know if the tragedy is a kidnapped child, domestic abuse or a ripped pair of LuLaRoe leggings in a pattern they discontinued. So if you really want help and not just attention from people begging for the details, just tell us what is up… personally I won’t pray for you, but I will definitely help any way that I can if you’d just spit it out already.

So prayer requests are common, but satanic sabotage is a new one for me. To think that a parent sees their kid get a boo-boo and instead of assuming this is one of life’s unfortunate events (bad things happen all the time, sorry if you are just learning this) their first instinct is that Satan is coming after them… ridiculous, almost comical, if it wasn’t  for the kids involved. I just imagine them teaching their kids these lessons. “Don’t worry Bobby, it isn’t your fault that you punched little Tommy, Satan was trying to turn you away from God”.  Listen, I don’t claim to know everything but one thing I am pretty sure of is that SATAN IS NOT ATTACKING YOUR CHILD. Blaming Satan (and I guess God for not protecting you from Satan) is dangerous. So many unavoidable crappy things are going to happen throughout your child’s life that they need to be prepared to place blame where it is appropriate, accept blame when they are at fault and distinguish when an unfortunate event is just a random act. If your daughter gets her period in the middle of the school dance while she’s wearing a white dress, this is biology, not Satan. If your son isn’t tall enough to slam dunk, this is genetics, it doesn’t mean that Satan is trying to hold him back.  If five minutes before your beautiful Catholic wedding is to start the groom splits his pants… it is not divine intervention attempting to stop the exchange of vows… it is an unfortunate moment that will become a funny story to pass on to grand-kids and a cautionary tale for all those to be married after you.

I love taking my personal life to social media, my network of mommy friends is as large as it is because of the power of the internet. That being said it is one thing to get advice on the best pampers, to vent about the day-to-day frustrations of being a parent, and to even give a little brag when your cutie pie does something extra special… it is another to assume that “likes” and “shares” will ward of Satan and bring God back to your side.  I assure you, if I am wrong and Satan is sabotaging your child’s life… the answer is not going to be found in a Facebook thread.