A Uterus from Nothing (part 5)

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Well, it is official, we are having a little girl. Arabella Lorelei is still due July 22, 2014 and she is developing perfectly. The anatomy scan was amazing.The baby is only half a pound and yet we can observe the kidney function, watch the blood flowing through the umbilical cord and see baby open and close her mouth all while doing little flips and twists right there in my tummy. I understand that ultrasounds have been around for quite sometime, but the advances in technology have been vast and the certainty with which health care providers can give out information is astounding.

Arabella will be the first child in a long line of family births to not be baptized simply out of tradition. The topic hasn’t caused a stir as of now, though to be fair, we have yet to discuss it with those who will care. However, I am sure that once baby arrives the backlash will begin. No matter what we encounter from either side of the family, I assure you that the Couple of Atheists will not back down. I know that some people will say that we should not sacrifice the baby’s “soul” simply because we choose not to believe… or that because of our atheism the ceremony is meaningless and should be viewed as drops of water and words… with a chance at redemption of her soul should me and Rich turn out to be wrong. Well, that is fine for some, but I take a different view.

I believe that participating in this, or any inherently religious ceremony, is disrespectful to those who do believe. Unlike many relationships, there is no internal conflict between Rich and myself and therefore no reason to compromise our ethics simply to appease others. I also do not view this as keeping Arabella away from God, but more not forcing God onto her. If at any point she finds that a life of faith is right for her, that will be fine, but I will not pressure her into something that I do not find beneficial to  life. Despite having one openly Atheist parent,  I was baptized, confirmed and made my confirmation within the Catholic church… and though this did not instill a belief in Christ, it forced onto me the stigma of being Catholic… and I won’t do that to my child.

As I watch the development of the baby progress, I begin to think more of her future. I know that we are going to encounter many situations along the way where the faith of others will attempt to overstep and cross the bounds of our rights as parents. There will be compromise at times, but not to the point that our family forgets what we believe in. And if you really find fault in a secular, humanist household, well I encourage you to keep reading and prepare to change your mind.

A Uterus from Nothing (part 2)

Success! That is right, not only was science able to make my body ovulate when it wasn’t doing it on it’s own… but now the couple of atheists are pregnant! Only 5 weeks and 1 day… so it is very early, but I can’t bear to keep it to myself.

Since sharing the news with friends and family, mixed reactions have occurred. Of course everyone has been happy and supportive… but not everyone gives the credit to science. For instance one of Rich’s friends said that God keeps giving us all of these signs… we are just refusing to see them. Apparently in his eyes it is God who brought Rich and I together in the first place and now  God has also given us the chance to have this baby. Rich said “but she was taking the medication, it  made her ovulate, we timed our sex and that is how we became pregnant.” His friend begged to differ stating that the medication didn’t have to work, God made it so.

Ok, so say this is true. God chose Rich and I to become parents… why the heck would he do that? Within the privacy of my PCOS support group walls I see women struggle with what they might have done to deserve being barren. They pray EVERY DAY to have a child. They take the same measures as Rich and I… They have the same condition I do and yet, God decided we should have the baby. It just seems unfair. If anything, it shows you’d be better off not believing because then God would have reason to “show himself” through these “miracles”… since of course he can’t just show up in your living room to prove his existence. No he has to test you… he tests the strength of those who believe by putting them through emotional hell and (apparently) proves himself by providing joy through “miracles”to those who don’t… how could anyone have respect for a God like that.

Just as before, I am in awe watching science at work. My blood tests are showing beta levels jumping high, just as they should. I can feel my body changing due to the shift in hormones and yet somehow I am supposed to credit someone other than my doctors and the many, many scientists who researched my condition and provided me with the tools to make this happen… I simply refuse. Heck, even the fact that I didn’t have to look for a faint line on the pregnancy test and then wonder if my eyes were deceiving me is crazy, it simply stated “pregnant”… that’s technology that I doubt God came up with. Certainly if he did exist he’d be fixing all of the disasters that occur each day and not making it easier for me to discover my pregnancy. Yeah, I am going to say this is also man made, not to mention AMAZING!

Now to be clear, I am not typically the type to get combative if someone “blesses me” or congratulates me on “my miracle”, just as when people prayed that we would conceive, I take it is as a kind gesture and say thank you. It is only when someone insists that God played a role that I feel the need to speak up. I am not on a witch hunt to knit-pick every religious reference… no, I simply want to document it here and since religion and spirituality are already creeping in at this early stage, I imagine it will only get more intense as the pregnancy progresses. This is going to be an amazing experience for Me and Rich and I look forward to sharing it with all of those who read our blog.

Disproving God’s existence isn’t my job.

I like you both and you make valid points. But really, aren’t you going to an awful lot of effort to disprove God’s existence? I find that so very sad. You seem to be very intelligent people and yet you hang your hat upon, what I surmise, you wish to be remembered for challenging people who believe in God.
Go down to the Philippines and help rebuild a house; hug a child who has lost her entire family, her world. Go to Somalia. Go to South East North Carolina. Better yet, go to………..

Cyn

This was left as a response to the couple of atheists blog. I dismissed it as a comment because I felt it served a better purpose as the focus of a blog… on the misconceptions of some believers. Cyn has been notified that I will be writing this, I hope they check it out.

First and foremost- Atheists are not out to disprove the existence of God. I am not sure when this atrocious accusation became so popular, but Rich and I hear it all of the time in debates and I feel the need to kick out the leg they think they are standing on.

In order for Atheists to be required to disprove God, there would have to be proof of God… and there isn’t. It is that simple. Believers have the burden of proof. They are claiming that there is something more out there dictating our lives and so before this needs to be disproved, it has to be proven. For me, as an Atheist, I am simply attempting to keep these beliefs out of our public policy.  I am not even a militant Anti-theist and I don’t believe my words or actions ever display something different.  When it comes to religion, believe what you want, but don’t claim it to be a truth and stop asking me to substantiate your argument…because I am not going to do it.

Cyn speculated we want to be remembered as people who challenged others belief in God. This is simply a way of making what we do a negative instead of allowing it to be positive… again, I won’t allow for this. I don’t see what I do in my local community or through this blog as simply “challenging” those who believe. I see it as educating those who perhaps never had access to information other than the religion in which they were raised. I am a firm believer that if you are able to come to the conclusion on your own, without bully tactics or being born into it, well c’est la vie! Adults have the right to research, learn and decide what works for them- so as ridiculous as I think it may be- I never “challenge” for the sake of “challenging”. Cyn said that they like me and Rich, but to make such an accusation shows that they know nothing about us, or at the very least, me. All of my friends of faith will tell you that I never belittle them. I open myself to discussion, I am glad to give information when requested, but never do I force my atheism onto them- as I find that practice to be just as dogmatic as any religious practice.

Moving on to the final portion, where I was directed to all of the things I could do instead of educating others on social issues. First off- kettle, kettle- black, black… as Cyn had plenty of time to hate on my blog while they could have been hugging those poor children and rebuilding houses. I am not going to give this part much weight as I don’t believe it deserves it. I could gush about my favorite charities and causes and all the good I do… but frankly that isn’t the point and I don’t need my good deeds to be justified to anyone.

So there you go. I hope this has cleared up any confusion that  Cyn or anyone else had concerning couple of atheists agenda. I’d join in and say you can “go to ……” but I am not the one that believes in that stuff… so I will just say, thanks for reading.